Some things to say:
firstly – to everyone who is finding this blog through searches about controlling men – a better resource is ‘Why Does He Do That?“, but I hope my post is of some help to some of you at least.
secondly – to the reader who asked google “how to date a controling man” and ended up here (if you’re still reading), the answer is you don’t. Get rid of him and find someone who isn’t a controlling arse. Or be happy on your own. Either way.
thirdly – to the reader who asked google “is it rape when i said no and was drunk?” YES IT IS. and it breaks my heart that you have to ask google this question. I blame the patriarchy that such a thing was necessary. Similarly, “is it rape if you don’t say yes?” YES IT IS. I hope you’re both still here somewhere.
fourthly – to the person who googled “fuck and rape” to end up here…. wtf? No, seriously, wtf?
I know it’s been awhile since I posted, but that happens. Regularly around here actually. I’m still seeing coffeeguy, who shall now be called C, and I’m enjoying that. Except for a few minor issues I may or may not explore later. I’m going to Italy and Spain (and Gib!) soon, and have too much to do in the meantime. And the depression is getting worse. The doctor has prescribed anti depressants to start after my trip, and I think the thought of taking them is making the depression worse. I hate that I’m so weak I need help to get through this. But there you have it. In a nutshell, the updates on my life. More (possibly) to follow.
My cousin (we’ll call her S) is breaking my heart. She is twenty four and has a lot going for her. Except for her dickhead boyfriend. He is not something good in her life and it hurts when I think of the situation she’s currently in.
I recently found out that he has previously cheated on her four times. That’s with four different people for those wanting the clarification. After this revelation (and it’s kinda telling that she hid this from us), she found out he had a mobile phone that he was hiding from her and, when she found it, he spent a long time trying to delete as many messages as he could before she saw them. He’s slept with at least two more women (as well as the other four) and has stopped short off sleeping with others. When all of this came to light, she dumped him. She didn’t kick him out of her house, or even our of her bed, but they were apparently broken up. And he was saying things like “I have nothing to live for without you” and “At work today I was on the 42nd floor and realised how easy it would be to unclip my harness”. Given past events, his comments are way out of line and unacceptable. I would dump him for that part alone. He also told her that the only reason they’re not together anymore is because she won’t forgive him.**