Links Round Up: To Continue A Theme
Following on from my Nice Guy posts, here are some people who write better than I do:
lemonadeandlemoncake at Iced Tea and Lemon Cake has Feminism 101 – Nice Guy Syndrome
Jeff Fecke at Shakesville has Explainer: What is a “Nice Guy?”
Jill at Feministe has I’ll take voting rights over a knight in shining armor, thanks.
tigtog dealt with it nicely at Finally, A Feminism 101 Blog in Frequently Whimpered Whines: The Nice Guys™ theme song
the ex-expat at The Hand Mirror has The nice guy (TM)
There’s a collection of awesome at Heartless Bitches
A comic here
Can anyone guess what I’ve spent all day at work doing?
They’re Just Not That Nice
These final two scenarios are long and tied up together, so I’m making them a separate post to the first one. It’s not just because I like extra hits on my blog, I swear 
Nice Guy Scenario 3; Douchebag. Not a very original nickname, granted, but I find it appropriate. And in this situation, more than in any of the others, I should have known better. I really really should have. But that’s ok, live and learn, onwards and upwards, blah blah etc etc.
Nice Guy Infestation
A Nice Guy infestation is spreading through my life like a zombie outbreak. Only nowhere near as cool. I wish I was in a zombie apocalypse and could smash heads in with sledgehammers. That would be way cool, especially compared to … this. I have four examples for you, dear readers, just from the last couple of weeks of my life. (And on a sidenote, aren’t you all lucky I chose to stop wasting my time with these dickwads, and start blogging again? Much better use of this precious resource, I think).
More Dating issues, or Why Do I Even Bother?
I officially decided a couple of months ago that I’m ready to start dating again after coffeeguy. Still trying to work out why I even bothered. (And to the few readers that I have left, sorry if you thought there would be less dating posts these days)
So, in no particular order…
Betrayed and lost
I had a friend. He was kind of my best friend. I could always count on him to say exactly what I needed (not wanted) to hear, and be there when I needed it.
When I was having issues with my sleeping (depression related – symptom of a bad relationship then a bad break up), his house was the only place I could get a full, decent night’s sleep.* When I hit my absolute lowest point and just did not want to bother anymore, it was his house I went to, so I could give up the need to be responsible and just let him take over for a while. And it went both ways, obviously. I was there for him all the time too, and did whatever I could to help him get his life on track and sort through stuff.
Return from the front line – Part 8
It was harder this time. I somehow managed to delude myself entirely about what was going on in the relationship, while at the same time I slowly started to lose different parts of my identity.
I let him treat me like crap for the three months, and I didn’t notice this until after we broke up. And even then, it was other people pointing it out that finally woke me up to it.
In the two weeks since we broke up, I’ve spent a lot of time with friends, I’ve gone out more than usual, I’ve been drunk more often than I’d care to admit on a public forum, and I’ve had more fun and been happier than ever. But I still have some unresolved issues to get out and I’m hoping this will help.
Where do trolls come from?
I’ve never had an official policy on comments for this blog, because I’ve never needed one. I’m still not going to implement one, however the following comments were never, ever going to be approved to be published. They will be posted here, though, just to make sure no one misses them.
If any of you feel like letting jjhatts know what you think of their shit, feel free. I’m not sure they’re worth the time, but someone certainly needs to wake this troll up.
On a post about unacceptable use of endearments by strangers:
Is bitch acceptable? Would it be offensive too you if I asked if you wear panties everyday at work? If it would, then I’m not asking. Also do you hang out every once in a while after work at any particular place? I’ll let you buy me a drink.
On the post about being asked to be a fill-in receptionist:
Did he tell you specifically that he’d like you too work customer service for a little while because you have a vagina, or do you just THINK the world revolves around your vagina?
And the one that really proved this *person* is an utter scumbag and total troll, from the ‘Rape is always Rape’ post:
She took her clothes off, she wanted too fuck. No means no, she didn’t say no, so they fucked. If I’d been there I would have gone for sloppy seconds.
For the record jjhatts, you’ve been added to the spam queue and your comments will not be approved on this blog. Take your ball elsewhere to play.
The Juiciest Gazelle is the Easiest to Catch*
My cousin (we’ll call her S) is breaking my heart. She is twenty four and has a lot going for her. Except for her dickhead boyfriend. He is not something good in her life and it hurts when I think of the situation she’s currently in.
I recently found out that he has previously cheated on her four times. That’s with four different people for those wanting the clarification. After this revelation (and it’s kinda telling that she hid this from us), she found out he had a mobile phone that he was hiding from her and, when she found it, he spent a long time trying to delete as many messages as he could before she saw them. He’s slept with at least two more women (as well as the other four) and has stopped short off sleeping with others. When all of this came to light, she dumped him. She didn’t kick him out of her house, or even our of her bed, but they were apparently broken up. And he was saying things like “I have nothing to live for without you” and “At work today I was on the 42nd floor and realised how easy it would be to unclip my harness”. Given past events, his comments are way out of line and unacceptable. I would dump him for that part alone. He also told her that the only reason they’re not together anymore is because she won’t forgive him.**
