I’ve noticed in every conversation I have with new people, I find a way of saying ‘my partner’ or ‘my boyfriend’ within the first few sentences. I don’t feel like I belong to Nigel, however I am well aware of the differences in the way I am treated when others believe I am “owned”.
But lately I haven’t been doing it. At all. I have, in fact, been avoiding using those phrases at all. I say things like ‘call home’ and ‘we’re going to Sweden’ and I gloss over exact details by talking fast and moving on to another subject.
I’m not ashamed of him. I’m not hiding it. I’d like to say I’m just choosing not to flout it, but that’s not true either.
Where’s the line? Why does the P make it so complicated? It’s not in my head. There are actual implications to how you are treated after telling or not telling people you are in a relationship. So far I haven’t ever put much thought into it, I just say or don’t say. It only occurred to me after a series of events on my journey home that this is what I’ve been doing. I can’t even pinpoint when the change occurred.
Too many questions left unanswered by this very tired blogger.