Open Relationships

January 25, 2009 at 11:12 pm (Nigel, personal)

I’ve been reading the posts over at Bitch Ph.D. on her open relationship and it’s got me thinking about relationships.

I know I don’t agree with the ‘proper’ set up the patriarchy drums into us in regards to relationships, but I don’t know what I do agree with.  I know that Nigel isn’t at the same point as I am, so that if I plan on making this work, I need to deal with the rules the patriarchy tells me to follow.  I know I don’t want to end this relationship right now, but I also know there are other opportunities I want to pursue.

I sometimes try to imagine what relationships will be like post patriarchy, but I have issues with this.  Mostly, I think relationships will be up to the individuals involved and won’t have such a cookie cutter feel to them.  Which is why it’s so hard to visualise.

And sometimes I just feel guilty that I’m in a long term heterosexual relationship.  There are many obstacles that women face in life that are negated with the support of a partner, and in a country that is rife with homophobia, there are obvious benefits to being in a heterosexual relationship.  The privilege I have is something I have to continually acknowledge and fight.

Don’t ya wish there was a perfect easy solution to everything?


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