Recently I have been trying to break an addiction. It’s damn hard.
I’m not talking about drugs, smoking, drinking or anything overly dangerous along those lines.
I’m talking about a little everyday addiction. Everyone has them, and mostly they’re ok. I used to be addicted to reading in a very severe way and you would never find me without a book. If I wasn’t reading, I was itching to pick up my book. This of course interfered with many areas of my life and made it hard to be successful at things requiring concentration on something other than reading. I’ve managed to break this habit, but not through any concerted effort. It’s more something that just fell away over time as I became busy with other things and started enjoying myself.
So clearly the lesson from that is to fill up my spare time and I’ll easily be able to overcome my addiction to the activity I’m trying to battle. The problem is when I actively make the effort to do this I end up binge drinking, or smoking, or both. Not healthy. It’s also that old catch 22, where the harder you try to not think about something, the more it is the only thing you can think about.
Anyway, I have taken active steps in combating this. I’ve removed any easy access I had to indulging in the temptation and I’ve resolved to be as strong as possible. It’s not going to help. But I’m trying as hard as I damn well can to fight this and be sane again.