Links Round Up: To Continue A Theme
Following on from my Nice Guy posts, here are some people who write better than I do:
lemonadeandlemoncake at Iced Tea and Lemon Cake has Feminism 101 – Nice Guy Syndrome
Jeff Fecke at Shakesville has Explainer: What is a “Nice Guy?”
Jill at Feministe has I’ll take voting rights over a knight in shining armor, thanks.
tigtog dealt with it nicely at Finally, A Feminism 101 Blog in Frequently Whimpered Whines: The Nice Guys™ theme song
the ex-expat at The Hand Mirror has The nice guy (TM)
There’s a collection of awesome at Heartless Bitches
A comic here
Can anyone guess what I’ve spent all day at work doing?
They’re Just Not That Nice
These final two scenarios are long and tied up together, so I’m making them a separate post to the first one. It’s not just because I like extra hits on my blog, I swear 🙂
Nice Guy Scenario 3; Douchebag. Not a very original nickname, granted, but I find it appropriate. And in this situation, more than in any of the others, I should have known better. I really really should have. But that’s ok, live and learn, onwards and upwards, blah blah etc etc.
THAT moment
There usually comes a moment in most new relationships or friendships where a feminist realises this new person she’s invested so much time and energy and trust etc in doesn’t view her as a human.*
It’s odd, because we know this to be true of most p-indoctrinated people. Things would not happen the way they do if the majority of the world viewed women as equal humans. But it’s just so heartbreakingly different when it smacks you in the face in your personal life.
The Juiciest Gazelle is the Easiest to Catch*
My cousin (we’ll call her S) is breaking my heart. She is twenty four and has a lot going for her. Except for her dickhead boyfriend. He is not something good in her life and it hurts when I think of the situation she’s currently in.
I recently found out that he has previously cheated on her four times. That’s with four different people for those wanting the clarification. After this revelation (and it’s kinda telling that she hid this from us), she found out he had a mobile phone that he was hiding from her and, when she found it, he spent a long time trying to delete as many messages as he could before she saw them. He’s slept with at least two more women (as well as the other four) and has stopped short off sleeping with others. When all of this came to light, she dumped him. She didn’t kick him out of her house, or even our of her bed, but they were apparently broken up. And he was saying things like “I have nothing to live for without you” and “At work today I was on the 42nd floor and realised how easy it would be to unclip my harness”. Given past events, his comments are way out of line and unacceptable. I would dump him for that part alone. He also told her that the only reason they’re not together anymore is because she won’t forgive him.**
Rape is Always Rape, Actually
Wow. I mean, we all knew this kind of attitude existed – feminists have been calling people out for this shit for years. Doesn’t mean I’d expect to see a Judge come out and say it. On the other hand, at least with this crap so blatant and out in the open we have a better chance of fighting it.
From the article:
A JUDGE has questioned if a man who had sex with a drunken woman after she passed out should be “marked for the rest of his days as a rapist”
In short, yes. Longer: Ab-so-fucking-lutely. Because he IS a rapist. So yes, he should be marked as one.
Don’t Feed the Trolls
In some of my recent researching, I’ve stumbled across www.thefrisky.com and absolutely love it. Not every single article is perfect, or stands up to feminist scrutiny, however overall it’s pretty damn awesome.
Now, I know it’s usually considered bad form to respond to a poster on a different site, but given the vile contents of these comments, I’m doing it anyway.
On a post about alternatives to intercourse, ‘Bat Leaper’ came out of the murky swamp where all mras and trolls like to spend their days and had this to say:
T-Shirts That Prove Men Hate You: Part 2
T-Shirts That Prove Men Hate You
Featured in part 2 is a shirt that I have not actually personally seen in real life. Which is lucky, for if I ever did see a guy wearing this, I would probably smack him. Hard. And then tell him to tell his face to stop banging into my hand. (makes more sense after the jump, I swear)
Credit where it’s due
SMH did something I never thought would happen: called rape, rape.
Here is an example of an article written properly. They call it rape. They call it sexual assault. They don’t blame the victim. They do mention she was unconscious from drinking alcohol, but I can’t sense the disapproval.
On another note, this is exactly what I was talking about in my previous post. (and in my next one once I’ve finished editing the notepad file and actually upload it!) How am I meant to comfortably go on my date tonight knowing that shit like this happens all the time? No wonder I sometimes think I hate men.
Nice Guy Syndrome
Since I started this blog I’ve been meaning to do a post on this. I know of at least a few readers who don’t know what this is and could do with some education on the matter (because it’s important.). However, due to my horrible procrastinating I haven’t gotten around to it. And now, someone else has posted awesomely and I’m just going to link to it to save myself repeating everything they’ve said.
I’m serious, go read it. It also ties in nicely with my post, Friend or Stalker. Of which I will have an update on very shortly. When I have more than two minutes left of blogging time!
hat tip to Hoyden About Town.
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